Friday, April 18, 2014

P | The P’s in my Life.. and Parenting :)

As a child if there was one P that dominated my life – It was “Play”. Be it sports or the fool, I’d ace J. As I grew, life was about the 3 P’s “Parents, Pals and Prayers”( Prayers especially for those “grades and marks” to take me through the “critical study years”! I meant the school exams, board exams and all the competitive exams that were a pre-requisite for any professional course).  After I enrolled for my Engineering education, the 2 P’s of “Peer-pressures and Programming” kept me busy. During my Management education, the 4P’s of Marketing – “Price, Product, Place, and Promotion” took the fore-front. The next phase of my life was P for profession which included the 3P’s of “Paisa, Pressures and Processes” (Thanks to the industry I work in). Of course all along, People, Politics and Poise played their part. As I entered matrimony, the 3P’s which dominated were Promises, Passion and Peace (or lack of at times! ;).

Then I became a mother. And I observed so many P’s which now began to dominate my life. First there were the Trio of Pee, Poop and Puke (Don’t smirk, These P’s dominate your life, thoughts and conversations!). But as I grew as a parent, I wondered what the most important P’s of Parenting

If there is one P that is absolutely critical in the journey of parenting, it is patience. You need to be patient with the questions, answers, teaching, learning, growing, mistakes, yourself and the children! And that is a whole lot of patience. If you are patient, the parenting journey is a lot smoother, enjoyable and pleasant. If not, parenting can be a very unpleasant experience! I did not start off the journey as a patient parent, but I soon realize that there was no other way. So I learnt. Did you?

The thing about parenting (and children) is that as parents, you can never ever give up on your children. And that needs a whole lot of perseverance.  To repeat till they understand.  To teach them right and wrong and all shades of gray in-between. To understand when silence speaks louder than words and when actions speak louder than words. To comprehend your own buttons, gears and brakes to keep your engine going! To figure out that the downtime and pause are as critical in the long run as the uptime and progress. It all takes time. And if you are a parent, the deal is till eternity. Up until then, you have to persevere

The other most important P of parenting is getting the Priorities right. In your mind in terms of what is important in the role you play as a parent, and also in terms of establishing ground rules for what is top priority in terms of your child’s growth and development. If you get the top priorities right on your list, and get them done in your actions – I guess both the parents and the children end up just fine!

If there was only one P that I would advocate, it is this. Be positive.(OK! If you’re blood group is B+, then is it easier, maybe ;). Parenting is a mixed journey. There are highs and lows, cyclones and anti-cyclones, storm and sun. And what I’ve learned (rather the hard way) is at the end of the day, you need to accept it all and move ahead. After all as a parent, you have no choice but to move on. And what better way than with a smile and positive thought, than a frown and negative thought. Easier said than done, but worth the try. The beauty of positive thinking is if you think positive, you speak and say positive things and you do positive things and that brings back a whole lot of positivity in your life – especially to and with your kids. One of the best pieces of parenting advice I got from a veteran in this area was “Even if you don’t feel / think positive, just fake it. Positivity will come right back at you”. Having personal experience now in this department, I completely agree.

So what do you think are the most important P’s of Parenting? Leave a comment to let me know.

As I sign off, I leave you with a few thought provoking quotes on parenting
The value of marriage is not that adults produce children, but that children produce adults. - Peter De Vries

Before I got married I had six theories about raising children; now, I have six children and no theories. - John Wilmot, 2nd Earl of Rochester (1647-1680)

We spend the first 12 months of our children's lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next 12 months teaching them to sit down and shut up. - Phyllis Diller

Thursday, April 17, 2014

O | The O letter words you should pay more attention to

Observe yourself and the world around you. There are valuable lessons in observation

Be Original – at least sometimes in your thoughts and expressions. You have a lot more originality that you think or display.

Only say Yes when you truly want to say Yes.

Go Out into nature once in a way. The real world is more beautiful than the virtual world

Switch Off (your phone, TV, for a few minutes every day). It can be one the best gifts to yourself

Our is a powerful word. Use it more often. In most instances, it is better than I – I speak from experience here J:)

Be sure to fully Own your time, your dreams, your passions and your life. They are yours. Claim them / Re-claim them. A journey / war that is well worth it

Once in a way, invest in yourself – doing what you really want to and love it, especially important once you turn 30 or get married or become parents

Open your mind and life to new thoughts and experiences – No matter what age or stage of life you are in. It can make all the difference

Liked this post? Do say so in the comments below .. I'm waiting to hear from you :)

And yes, the inspirational words for today

Wednesday, April 16, 2014

N | Say "NO NO NO" – Loud and Clear.. For what?

One of the most powerful words in the English language is this two-letter word “NO”. A simple, clear and assertive “NO” has the power to transform any life. And yet, many of us are guilty of using this word so very sparingly. Many of us just cannot get ourselves to say NO. The words just fail to come out.

I wonder why it is so hard to say “No”? We want to say “No” to him / her / them, and we end up saying “Yes” to all of them. I think it usually is the compound effect of one’s upbringing, one’s social conditioning, one’s own fears and inhibitions on the repercussions of saying NO based on past personal experiences and the experiences of others around you.

And here’s the real thing | In saying “YES” to everyone all the time, you ends up saying “NO” to yourself every single time. Is it really worth it? I don’t think so.

Once in a way, say “YES” to yourself and “NO” the others. It is one of the best gifts you can give yourself.

So what should anyone say NO to do?

Say NO to people and situations which make you feel small

Say NO to people which are critical / judgmental of everything you do

Say NO to what takes you away from what you truly want in life

Say NO to people who make you validate your existence every single say

Say NO to negativity in any way or form – be it your own thoughts, feelings, words and deeds or others feelings, words and deeds

Say NO who shake and break your self-confidence

Say NO to those who made you sad

Say NO to what makes you feel guilty and sorry every other day

Say NO to what drains your energy (in a not so nice way)

Say NO to what you believe is wrong

Say NO to being exploited

Say NO to any kind / form of abuse

Say NO to what you believe is wrong

Say NO to hurt

Say NO to pain

Say NO to fear

Say NO to "Yes"... sometimes so you can say "Yes" to yourself

 No is a complete sentence and so often we forget that.
When we don’t want to do something we can simply smile and say no.
We don’t have to explain ourselves, we can just say “No”.
Early on my journey I found developing the ability to say no expanded my ability to say yes and really mean it.
My early attempts at saying no were often far from graceful but with practice even my no came from a place of love.
Love yourself enough to be able to say yes or no
By Susan Gregg

As I sign-off, I leave you with some powerful quotes I came across

Tuesday, April 15, 2014

M | 3 M's which make the world go round and round

OK.. So I've been mulling over what are the 3 M's which make the world go round..   

(1) Money
Yes! Whether we like it or not. Money is an incredible power and force which truly makes the world go round. Money can be the cause for many beautiful creations and also the cause of several worldly destruction's. Money can make or break dreams, hopes, people, lives, families, communities, countries, nations and societies. Money can create divide, money can unite. Money can mend bridges and break them too. Money can conquer and money can conquest.
Yes! Money can do a lot of things.. And it surely plays a role in making the world go round and round

(2) Marriage
Marriage is that one institution which has existed from time immemorial. Marriage is the foundation on which history was made. Marriage is also the cause for history to be unmade. Marriages are the reason and cause we exist. Marriage is the cause for societies to thrive and flourish. Marriages is also the cause for perish! Marriage is the cause of happiness, good change and new beginnings. Marriages are also the cause of sadness, bad change and closures & endings.
And so Yes! Marriages can do a lot of things.. And they surely play a role in making the world go round and round

(3) Magic
Magic or that "special something" which you can't put your finger on, you can't spot, you can't define, you can't fully understand, you can't see - But you can feel and experience. The magic in the air, The magic within you, The magic of that force.. It exists! It is the answer to what science cannot fully explain, the mind cannot fully rationalize and one can never truly understand!
Yes! The Magic exists. Call it what you want. But it surely plays a role in making the world go round and round. You and Me exist because of this Magic

 As I sign-off, the quote for the day

Monday, April 14, 2014

L | 5 Most Important L's of LIFE

Start of a new week. A to K down. Wow! And it is time for "L". L is an easy word to write about - I mean there are just so many things which are integral to us and L - Life, Like, Love, Loss, Limits, Longing, Leaning, Laughing, Lessons, Listen, Left(-over, -ist,-feet), Light  - I mean you can write anything.

But in continuining with the "spirit of my theme", here I am pondering over what are the most important L’s of LIFE? Those L’s which govern your life, which create your present, which drive your future and which determine your ultimate destiny?

1) Love a little
Love is one of the most beautiful, powerful and transformational human emotion. If you are in a state of "Love", life is beautiful. So what to Love? Love yourself, your family, your friends, your institutions, your body, your mind, your heart, your past, your present, your home, your environment, your gifts, your talents, your education, your job, your spirit, your unique gifts, your dreams, your food, your sleep, your success, your failure, your laughs, your tears.. Love just about everything!

2) Learn a lot
Being a continuous and lifelong learner is one of the most important gifts you can bestow on yourself. And you can learn just about anything you want, and from just about anyone you think is qualified to teach you. Simply because continuous learning is such a rewarding and fulfilling experience in the journey of life. As you learn new things, you expose your mind, thoughts, emotions, dreams and life to new openings, new possibilities, new opportunities, new ideas, new harbingers. And hence it is important to make learning everyday a priority and a habit in your life.

3) Laugh a little
Laugh a little laugh everyday. It goes a long way in keeping you healthy, balanced, in control of things and equips you to see an alternative slice of life. Whatever makes you laugh, just spend 5 minutes doing it everyday

4) Live a lot
Live life - Truly experience what life has to offer. Good, Bad and Ugly. Take it in, Make it yours.. In this very moment. The present is all you've got! So truly Live it!

5) Let Live
Let others around you live. Live in peace, live with themselves and live with their beliefs and live to be happy! Don't judge, don't criticize and don't try to influence. Just let them be, like you'd like to Be!

So, what is your "L" view? Leave a comment to let me know

Linking this post to UBC too.